British rail complaints
My list of complaints about trains and the railway system in Britain could fill a fair few medieval scrolls, but in recent times, I’ve started to notice a new irritant.
Noise on train travel from Sheffield to London and Manchester
I live in Sheffield, and thus regularly have to catch trains to travel – usually to airports in London or Manchester. On the whole, I like travelling by train. But I don’t like being bombarded by noise as I do so.
The familiar complaint is about young people playing music too loudly, either through headphones or on their mobile phones. That annoys me too, but I take it as part of the territory. On public transport, you have to encounter the public, no matter how inconsiderate or lacking in taste they may be.
East Midlands Trains staff
My bugbear is increasingly with the train staff, however. Those on East Midlands Trains on the Sheffield to London line are particularly bad. They seem to revel in making as many announcements as humanly possible – and not just about the upcoming stations.
They – somewhat ironically – prattle on about not using phones or creating unnecessary noise in the quiet coach, despite the fairly prominent signs plastered all over said quiet coach indicating the same thing.
Passengers are given a running commentary on the status of the buffet car, be it open, closed, about to open or possibly closing in five minutes.
There are also regular announcements informing that tickets will be checked – as if people didn’t quite understand the concept of paying to travel by train.
It all adds up to a pretty much non-stop blather of thoroughly unnecessary noise.
Ryanair advertising philosophy
This is something I come to expect from Ryanair. The Irish budget airline prides itself of bombarding you with as much advertising as possible on a flight in its sterling bid to make air travel as cheap and unpleasant as possible. I’m somewhat surprised that their flight attendants don’t wear camel skin coats with strings of dodgy watches attached to the lining.
I sincerely hope our train companies aren’t going the same way. I enjoy the quiet time on a two hour trip to London. It’s a chance to relax, read, or get on with a bit of writing. Doing that with announcements blaring every 30 seconds is a mite tricky.
Service ethic gone wrong?
Personally, I don’t think this is about shifting as many overpriced sandwiches as possible. I reckon is part of a misguided service ethic.
Many companies seem to think that good service equates to providing as much information as possible and trying to give every customer every detail they could wish to know.
Manchester Piccadilly station safety announcements
A classic example comes from Manchester Piccadilly railway station. I was there last week, and there was an announcement playing on a constant loop. It was informing passengers that due to the wet weather, they should take extra care as the platforms could be slippery.
Now I’m not one of the Health And Safety Gone Mad crowd, but it wasn’t even raining, and there had been no discernable sign of rain for two days. The announcements are arguably unnecessary at the best of times, but on a sunny day they’re plain ridiculous.
Cutting down the announcements
Transport companies and service providers have got to stop equating noise pollution with doing the job well. By all means announce what is absolutely necessary, but apply an editorial function. If people really want to know, they can ask. And, to the train managers making constant announcements about the buffet cars on East Midlands Trains – please shut up.
Train travellers around the world – do you get sick of unnecessary announcements? Or are the British trains particularly bad for this? Share your thoughts below.
Tags: East Midlands Trains, London, Manchester, Ryanair, Sheffield, St Pancras Station, technology, train travel, Transport
When the trams in Melbourne were privatised in 1999, the two new companies took to making constant service announcements over the hitherto hardly ever used speakers within the trams.
You can imagine how pleased bleary-eyed, sardine-packed commuters were at 8am on a frosty morning to be greeted by the overly cheerful tones of a bright young thing played too loudly over defective crackling speakers. The wonderful innovation didn’t last long.
‘Welcome aboard this South-West Trains service to London/Waterloo’ particularly gets my goat. I KNOW where the train’s going, thanks to the destination boards and announcements on the platform. (and, I know who it belongs to … it’s got ‘South West Trains’ painted on the side)
It’s the difference between a public-service ethic and a privatised environment where the train companies have to make money. The only reason they prattle about the buffet car is to make you think ‘ooh I’m a bit peckish I’ll go and buy a sandwich’. And also because of a misguided idea that people actually chose their train company and so are enjoying the experience of being in an East Midlands Trains corporate environment, which the train managers are required to make as ‘welcoming’ as possible. Totally wrongheaded management strategy, in other words.
I just got back from Switzerland, where all they say is “Next stop Zurich” – but that’s because the platform announcements are always right, and always audible and clear, and the departure boards always work and are always right, and there are detailed timetables posted everywhere listing departures (yellow posters), arrivals (white posters) and the make-up of every train showing which carriages are available in which order (blue posters). Then, as you approach Zurich (or whatever), the bloke comes on and says “Your next connections at Zurich: for the 7.55 to Basel cross to platform 4, for the 8.01 to Bern go to platform 1, for the 7.56 to Zurich Airport platform 5, for the 8.04 to Geneva platform 8, sorry but the 8.01 to Baden is currently running 46 seconds late but it will shortly arrive on platform 3″ etc etc. But that’s only because there is at least half-hourly service on every major line, every train is on time, and every connection has been planned on a timetable designed to function nationwide so that trains are integrated with each other, and with the bus network too. I could go on…
Thanks for the comments, guys.
Very good point Matthew – I suspect those higher up are so wrapped up in their own little corporate world that they don’t realise that the people actually using the trains just want to get from A to B as quickly and as painlessly as possible. They don’t want to buy into the East Midlands Trains experience – they just want to get to bloody London.