How the travel industry can become more rock ‘n’ roll

If Iggy Pop can advertise car insurance, Johnny Rotten can plug butter and Bob Dylan can be the voice of a Sat-Nav, why can’t other music legends get in on the self-prostitution act? The travel industry is clearly missing a trick here – why not get a few rock icons in to boost visitor numbers? Here are a few things I’d like to see.

1. Carlos Santana playing in airport arrivals halls. The Pacific islands tend to have a chap with a ukulele strumming away with a rictus grin on his face when planes land in the early hours of the morning. Why not get Santana doing the same at LAX?
2. Paul McCartney as the face of a package holiday firm. Someone should take advantage of Macca’s little penchant for putting his thumbs up at any given opportunity. Imagine him superimposed on pictures of Cyprus, Malta and Benidorm, gurning with his thumbs in the air. Slogan? Here, There and Everywhere.
3. Roy Orbison as the new voice of training videos for tour bus drivers. Roy sings “I drove all night. Is that alright?” Immediately follow up with harrowing footage of a nasty car crash. Then Roy comes on to say: “Actually, it’s not alright. I should have taken a mandatory rest break every two hours.”
4. Jay-Z as the face of a travel insurance firm. He’s got 99 problems, but emergency medical care whilst abroad is not one.
5. Red Hot Chili Peppers promote Delaware. After all, they seem to mention California in every single song, so why not give them a couple of hundred thousand dollars to change their geographical focus?
6. The Rolling Stones as the new face of Ryanair. Trying to sing “You Can’t Always Get What You Want” as they sit on a rusty spike and a surly air-hostess tries to sell them a scratchcard.
7. Bono advertising winter sun holidays. “Because some of us like to wear sunglasses all the time.”
8. Elton John, in a rubber ring, on posters for a water park. No reason… there’s just something immensely satisfying about the mental image.

Tags: Bob Dylan, Elton John, Iggy Pop, Jay-Z, Johnny Rotten, marketing, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Roy Orbison, Travel Industry