A to Z of Eastern Europe | Albania to Zagreb

A is for Alphabet: Some countries, including Bulgaria, Belarus and Russia, use the Cyrillic alphabet. If you want signs to be vaguely comprehensible, it’s advisable to learn it before you go…

B is for Bucks’ party: Cheap drink, cheap flights and attractive women can only mean one thing: hordes of lairy males wearing team T-shirts piling over for a last weekend of freedom. Tallinn in Estonia and Riga in Latvia are the worst affected.

C is for Communism: Much of the region has disowned the former Soviet ideology with such gusto that it may as well have never existed. However, some haven’t quite abandoned it – the breakaway de-facto state of Transdniestr in Moldova still lives in a timewarp zone of secret police, non-existent service standards and unswerving devotion to all things USSR.

D is for Dumplings: No Eastern European meal is truly complete without a good dollop of stodge to accompany it. In Poland, they are Pierogi, and stuffed with potatoes, meat or cheese, while the bready knedliky of the Czech Republic keep it simple and are made pretty much of yeast, egg, flour and milk.

E is for Enlargement: With the European Union expanding rapidly to the east, the Holy Grail for many governments has been to get their affairs in order and join the rich boys’ club. Croatia is next in line, while Bulgaria and Romania joined at the start of 2007. Those that are already in have had masses of money thrown their way, leading to many improvements. Alas, for tourists, it also means prices have gone up.

F is for Flight: The recent boom in budget airlines has made getting to Eastern Europe from major Western European cities a bargain. The likes of Wizzair and AirBaltic (www.airbaltic.com) are based in the east, and often offer ridiculous prices. G is for Gypsies: Especially prevalent in the Balkan region and Romania, the gypsy lifestyle is sadly misunderstood in some quarters, and – disgracefully – persecuted in others.

H is for Hungarians: There are well over a million of them in Romania – Europe’s biggest ethnic minority. Hence those noble efforts to learn Romanian may be entirely useless, especially around the border regions.

I is for Islands: One of the highlights of any trip to the region is sailing around the islands of Croatia’s Adriatic coast. Korčula and Brač are amongst the most popular, with the cities of Split and Dubrovnik the main gateways.

J is for Jelly Belly: Cheap beer and big mounds of stodgy food piled high every meal can only lead to one thing…

K is for Kaliningrad: A bizarre exclave of Russia, it is entirely surrounded by Lithuania and Poland. However, Kaliningrad is also home to one of the great natural wonders of the region. The Curonian Spit is a World Heritage-listed strip of sand that stretches for miles, and it’s well worth braving the Russian visa regulations to get there.

L is for Lakes: For landlocked areas, these become the equivalent of coastal resorts. Try Balaton in Hungary, Shkodra in Albania/ Montenegro or Ohrid in Macedonia.

M is for Mountains: While some areas are as flat as a pancake (hello Estonia and Latvia!), others are wonderful for walking in the summer or skiing in the winter. The Tatras (Poland and Slovakia) and Carpathians (Ukraine and Romania) are the best spots to head for to breathe in the mountain air.

N is for Nightlife: In many cities – especially Prague in the Czech Republic, Riga in Latvia and Chisinau in Moldova – anyone out before midnight and back before 6am is a pitifully weak specimen of the human race.

O is for Orthodoxy: A different slant on Christianity means a different style of church and cathedral – just the ticket by those bored rigid by those cathedral-of-the-day tours in Western Europe.

P is for Pork: Apparently it is possible to eat other meats within Eastern Europe, but this may just be a nasty rumour. The truly brave/ corpulent can take on the absolutely humungous pork shoulder in Slovakia and the Czech Republic.

Q is for Queuing: This can be an entirely alien concept. Why stand in a line when you can walk straight in front of it?

R is for Russians: While Russian is the second language that is most widely understood in Eastern Europe, it is also the language that the people often least want to hear. So, even if you do speak it quite well, expect the sort of selective hearing pioneered by the French when listening to English.

S is for Statues: Most of those hilariously pompous statues of Communist leaders have been pulled down. Never fear though, a mad Lithuanian bought them all and put every single one of them in his freaky theme park. Gruto Parkas (www.grutoparkas.lt) is in Druskininkai, Lithuania.

T is for Torture Museum: Every city worth its salt has a small, immensely tacky museum that is piled high with grimacing waxworks and gruesomely-shaped pieces of rusty metal from medieval times.

U is for Uzupis: A suburb of the Lithuanian capital, Vilnius, Uzupis has declared itself independent and written its own constitution. This legal framework does seem rather obsessed with being nice to cats, however.

V is for Vampires: You can’t go to Transylvania – the literary home of Count Dracula – without visiting Dracula’s castle in Bran, Romania. Sharpen the wooden stake beforehand, however.

W is for Wine: Some of the locally-produced stuff – especially from Moldova and Bulgaria – is actually surprisingly good. Ukrainian champagne, however, is not.

X is for X-rated: Part of the fun is walking a few seconds away from beautiful Old Town architecture to find yourself next to a massage parlour and a shop front that has ‘Sexy Sexy’ in beaming neon.

Y is for Youth: Many Eastern European youths are frantic to learn English, and appreciate the service standards expected by visitors paying good money. Alas, a lot of them have run off to earn good money in the west, leaving dyed-in-the-wool grunting old folk in charge of ticket booths and hotels in many parts.

Z is for Zagreb: Alphabetically, Croatia’s capital is the last in the world. And, because all the tourists are on the Adriatic coast, when you arrive there you have a severely underrated city all to yourself. It tends to go off on a Friday night, incidentally.

This article was originally written for Ninemsn.

Copyright David Whitley