Last November, I learned a valuable lesson. We were half-planning a Caribbean holiday, when we saw flights to the Seychelles for under £400. Figuring we’d never be able to get there as cheaply again, we snapped the tickets up and decided to take the opportunity to do a famous luxury destination on the cheap.

Island paradise?

We had been taken in by the long-standing island paradise reputation of the Seychelles; we saw it almost as a trophy holiday. And once we got there, we realised what a mistake we’d made.

Expensive places on the cheap

The islands of the Seychelles are undoubtedly very pretty indeed, and many of the high end hotels are fabulous places to stay. But we hadn’t got a high end budget, and as much as the journalist in me loves the mileage of doing expensive places on the cheap, it really is a fool’s mission at times.

Food and drink

The Seychelles is a very expensive place to visit. Rather shabby guesthouses will set you back over £90 a night – almost double what you’d pay for a similar standard in the UK. But it’s the food and drink that really mounts up. Finding a cheap meal is virtually impossible, while heavy import taxes mean that a bog standard bottle of wine can cost two or three times what it would do in a UK restaurant. Inter-island ferries are also outrageously pricey.

Saving money

Our wallets ended up hurting, and we ended up scrimping on what we wanted to do in order to save money. Holidays shouldn’t be about tight belts, should they?

Boredom sets in

But more importantly, there really isn’t all that much to do in the Seychelles. Yes, it’s pretty and there is the odd garden or tea factory worth seeing, but for people who are incapable of relaxing on a beach for more than a few hours, it all becomes a bit tedious.

Suitable destination?

We had been taken in by the name and the deal. We hadn’t considered whether the destination suited either our temperament or our wallets. We hadn’t done the research before we’d booked, and we essentially fell into a marketing trap.

Alternative holidays

In future, we’ll know better. There really is no point in going to a place almost entirely set up for luxury travel when you haven’t got that sort of money. You’ll just end up feeling Scroogeish and miserable. We could have gone to Thailand, Malaysia or large swathes of the Caribbean and spent a fraction of what we spent in the Seychelles.

Things to do in the Seychelles?

We also learned that if you’re the sort of person who likes to ‘do stuff’ while abroad, then you should look for a place where there’s lots to do. There’s no point in forcing yourself to be a relaxed person if you just don’t have the character attributes.

Similar destinations

We now know better. Similar destinations – such as Mauritius, the Maldives and the Turks and Caicos Islands – are well and truly off our wish list. We’re not resorty people; we need a holiday with a bit more to it than great service and infinity pools. We also need to be able to explore without feeling aggrieved at how much money we’re spending at every turn.

Picking the right holiday

As we learned in the Seychelles, there’s far more to picking the right holiday than just getting a great deal to an impressive-sounding exotic locale. You need to think about what you enjoy and what the on-the-ground costs are likely to be – otherwise that great deal can end up as a crushing disappointment.

I was extremely reluctant to join Twitter. As with many who have an antipathy towards it, I thought it was a place for self-obsessed morons to blather about what they had for breakfast. I didn’t know what it was for – and in a way I still don’t, but I have decided that’s the beauty of it. I don’t think ANYONE knows what it’s for and the moment anyone elects to use Twitter for a singular purpose, people stop paying attention to them.

Outsider?

I have been on Twitter for a couple of months now, and the key thing it has made me realise is that I’m not as much of an outsider as I think I am. I’ve realised that everyone is something of an outsider, with their own furrows and interests. What Twitter does is highlight where those furrows and interests overlap.

Venn Diagram

It seems to me like a giant Venn Diagram. Much of what is said on Twitter is of no interest to most people and can be happily ignored. The magic happens in the crossover – I ignore most of what person X says, but when they say something I have an interest in or knowledge of, I can jump in and contribute something. Every now and then, I stop being an outsider. And because there are so many of these crossovers with so many different people, I’m constantly part of a conversation and thus effectively not an outsider at all.

Autobiographical details

At this point, I should probably give a bit of an autobiography. I’ll try and keep it brief. I’m English, I have a degree in journalism, and after university I went to Australia. There I landed a job as the editor of a backpacker magazine, and did a bit of freelance travel writing on the side. I came back home in 2006 and gambled on going freelance full time. It worked.

Not part of the travel industry

At no point, however, have I ever really felt myself part of the travel industry or the travel media industry. I don’t go to expos, trade events or travel media social functions. I have peculiar, difficult to deal with niches – the Sydney Morning Herald has phoned me up in Sheffield to write pieces on Sydney, and no-one seems to know what to do with a UK-based journalist who is writing for Australian, New Zealand, US or Canadian publications. I barely know any other travel writers, editors or PR people on a face to face basis. I have a blog but am wary of anyone who calls themself a blogger rather than a journalist who has a blog. I have the trained journalist’s natural antagonism towards PR people, but know I have to deal with them at times.

No neat categories

In essence, I don’t fit properly into any neat categories. I’m sprawled over several, and that has always made me feel a complete outsider in “The Travel Industry”.

Testing the waters with Twitter

What Twitter has done has made me realise how many people I cross over with in some way. It has also made me realise that everyone else is an outsider too. And as everyone is still rather unsure what they’re supposed to be doing with Twitter, they’re consistently testing the waters with people they would never ordinarily talk to if they met face to face. Everyone is realising where their niches and fascinations collide.

Twitter: A meeting place

I’ve  ‘met’ some fascinating people on Twitter. A few of them I’ve previously met in real life. A few of them I’ve exchanged e-mails with. A few of them I’ve heard of before and I admire their work. The vast majority, however, were complete strangers before I discovered them, found some of what they’re saying was interesting, and started interacting with them.

Australian travel media, PR and bloggers

I’ve started interacting with people who work in the Australian travel media (a field I’ve always been a complete lone wolf in as my social circles never collided). I’ve started regarding PR people as enjoyable to converse with rather than a necessary evil to do combat with. I’ve had fascinating exchanges with bloggers, to the point where I may have to concede defeat and regard them as ‘fellow bloggers’ – their thoughts are too valuable to pour snobbish disdain upon. I’ve gained valuable insights from people who run travel companies. I’ve began to understand the thought processes of the occasional commissioning editor. I’ve learned from social media experts and online technology gurus. It’s been a truly fascinating experience.

Outsiders brushing against each other

But the key thing I’ve realised is that while I am, by and large, an outsider, everyone else is too. The social media experts are learning from the travel company MDs where their disparate interests happen to intersect. The Aussie writers, the British writers, the online tech gurus, the bloggers, the PRs, the columnists, the editors, the broadcasters, the book authors, the backpackers, the luxury travel experts, the adventure seekers and the family travellers… they’re all brushing against each other and finding unexpected things they have in common. It’s a giant Venn Diagram of outsiders. And everyone’s now trying to work out what they’re actually ‘outside’ of. That’s wonderful – and it’s also why I fervently hope nobody ever works out what Twitter is ‘for’.

1. Carlos Santana playing in airport arrivals halls. The Pacific islands tend to have a chap with a ukulele strumming away with a rictus grin on his face when planes land in the early hours of the morning. Why not get Santana doing the same at LAX?
2. Paul McCartney as the face of a package holiday firm. Someone should take advantage of Macca’s little penchant for putting his thumbs up at any given opportunity. Imagine him superimposed on pictures of Cyprus, Malta and Benidorm, gurning with his thumbs in the air. Slogan? Here, There and Everywhere.
3. Roy Orbison as the new voice of training videos for tour bus drivers. Roy sings “I drove all night. Is that alright?” Immediately follow up with harrowing footage of a nasty car crash. Then Roy comes on to say: “Actually, it’s not alright. I should have taken a mandatory rest break every two hours.”
4. Jay-Z as the face of a travel insurance firm. He’s got 99 problems, but emergency medical care whilst abroad is not one.
5. Red Hot Chili Peppers promote Delaware. After all, they seem to mention California in every single song, so why not give them a couple of hundred thousand dollars to change their geographical focus?
6. The Rolling Stones as the new face of Ryanair. Trying to sing “You Can’t Always Get What You Want” as they sit on a rusty spike and a surly air-hostess tries to sell them a scratchcard.
7. Bono advertising winter sun holidays. “Because some of us like to wear sunglasses all the time.”
8. Elton John, in a rubber ring, on posters for a water park. No reason… there’s just something immensely satisfying about the mental image.

To summarise, if I find a Twitterer dull, irrelevant or overly irritating, then I see no reason to keep following them. Nothing personal – it’s just not to my taste.

As part of this, I touched upon travel PR companies. I have unfollowed a couple because all I see from them is a stream of promotional material about their clients. Others (who I am still following or I wouldn’t have seen it) have questioned whether they do this too.

So how can travel PR companies, marketing people at travel firms and tourist board types best use Twitter? Well, my opinion isn’t necessarily representative, but from a travel journalist’s perspective, I’d say PR peeps should bear the following points in mind…

ONE: Go easy on the press releases

Sorry guys, but I rarely give your press releases more than a cursory glance. I get them via Travmedia, I get them via e-mail but the simple fact of the matter is that they are rarely relevant to what I am writing about. Perhaps one in 300 contains a story that makes me think: “Ooh, I could get something out of that.”

Most contact I have with PR companies is when I am searching for a certain piece of information. I know who represents where, and will contact as needed – I know clients require you to send out press releases, but from the writer’s end, these are the least important part of your job.

Twitter should not be seen as an extra route in which to push press releases out. When I get annoyed with them in my email inbox, I have to delete them, but they don’t really get in the way. On Twitter, they’re intrusive and clog up my screen. There’s a simple way of dealing with that: I just stop following, and the noise goes away.

There’s no harm in sending out the odd press release on Twitter, but if the majority of your Tweets are about clients and their new projects, then it quickly becomes spammy.

TWO: Approach Twitter as a human, not as a PR firm

Part of what I love about Twitter is that it acts as a discussion forum. People talk about all manner of events, developments and trends. They occasionally indulge in light-hearted banter too. It’s something of a big talking shop, featuring people from different sectors of the industry that I would have probably never met in real life.

The people I like to follow are the ones that will join in that discussion; they’ll add to existing debates, bring up new topics and respond to my own thoughts. And they do so as a human being rather than as a corporate mouthpiece.

Few PR firms seem to do this – perhaps because they’re not sure what they should be saying under the company banner.

But one thing’s for sure – when they slip out something about their client, I am far more likely to pay attention to a PR firm which does join the debate. It’s the difference between mentioning something in conversation and barging into a conversation, shouting about something like a scary tramp in a doorway.

THREE: Retweet our articles

As a rule, writers are ridiculously shallow individuals. If we have an article out, we like to think people have noticed it. And it’s a nice ego massage to read someone saying: “Really liked the piece on Xville that @mrdavidwhitley wrote in Publication Y this week.” It’s even better if you can provide a link so that others can read it. As long as it’s not done too often and it comes across as genuinely meant, this is a pathetically excellent way of both tickling our tummies and – ta da! – getting a few more eyeballs looking at something about your client.

FOUR: Share links to something interesting

If you find something on the internet that’s quite interesting, something you think your followers may enjoy too, pop a link to it on Twitter. If it’s nothing to do with your clients, even better: you’re building up the brownie points for when you do need to talk shop again. Again, it’s about acting like a human rather than a corporate automaton.

FIVE: Track mentions of your clients

Periodically using search terms is (ie. Xland, Y Safaris, Z Cruises) to check what people are saying about your client, I assume, is standard practice. The skill is in how you use that information – a tailored on-topic response such as “Re: Y Safaris in Xland – they’ve got a sale on at the moment” or “Re: Z cruises complaint – I’ll mention that to the management for you if you like” can be really effective.

SIX: Respond to requests with relevant information

Surely the most effective way that travel PR companies can use Twitter is to respond directly to requests or musings from writers with something relevant.

I saw a classic  example of this earlier today. One writer stated she was looking for European hotels that have opened this year for under £150 a night.

Soon after came a response from @SaltmarshPR. They’d found one that fitted the description in Slovenia. That’s exactly how Twitter can be used for PR good – the response was helpful, relevant and will hopefully get a bit of publicity for a client without annoying everyone.

Earlier, I tried this myself, putting out a request for tips on travelling independently in the Seychelles. I’m heading there in November, and am currently in the process of researching and lining up commissions. About half an hour later, I got a detailed email from Richard Mellor (@Travel_PR) detailing the small guesthouses and lodges that one of his clients – Expert Africa – use. Just what I wanted – and a great example of how PR can work well on Twitter.

If you want a list of people to follow on Twitter, then you’ll not struggle to find them. There are hundreds of such lists out there on the web. Alas, most aren’t very helpful.

These Twitterer lists generally fit into one of two categories. Either they’ve got so many names that they’re just overwhelming – a little selectivity wouldn’t go amiss – or they just list the names with no other details. This latter approach is fairly useless – I want to know why I should be following someone.

Travel Twitterers who AREN’T worth following 

With this in mind, I have created a list of fifteen travel Twitterers worth following. I follow all for different reasons, but first a few words on who I have stopped following. These generally fall into the following categories:

1. Publications – such as the Daily Telegraph and the Guardian – who only use Twitter to publicise their stories via an automated feed.
2. PR companies who continuously spam Twitter with blather about their clients. I get enough of that via e-mail, thank you very much.
3. Twitterers whose interests and fields are vastly different to mine. Nothing wrong with foodie travel, family travel or cycling, but I can’t really engage with it and it ends up becoming irritating background noise.
4. Excessively noisy Twitterers who feel the need to update the world on absolutely everything.
5. Deathly earnest (and usually American) Twitterers who end up boring me about subjects I’m not interested in. There is a high crossover between numbers four and five here…

Travel Twitterers who ARE worth following

But now for the good people. The following fifteen are people in the travel field that I find interesting, funny or both. Try them – you might like them.

For inside knowledge and good links

Den Schaal (aka @denschaal): This freelance travel industry expert is probably the most knowledgeable I’ve come across. He digs out stories, offers great analysis of travel industry machinations and does so with remarkable frequency. He has an irritating habit of retweeting his own blog posts a few too many times, but it’s forgivable in this instance because they’re usually worth reading.

Guillaume Thevenot (aka @hotelblogs): Good, no punches pulled information and opinion on the hotel industry.

Alastair McKenzie (aka @alastairmck): Classic example of making what you do say count. Alastair uses Twitter only when he’s found something interesting, or has something genuinely useful to add.

The Global Traveller (aka @globtrav): Digs out plenty of interesting info and links, often with an Antipodean slant, but without the parochiality that can often come from that part of the world.

Alex Bainbridge (aka @alexbainbridge): Opinionated and highly knowledgeable, particularly in the fields of online travel and industry developments.

Sam Daams (aka @samdaams): Dutchman living in Oslo with a strong insight into the world of online travel and web technology.

Darren Cronian (aka @travelrants): Rather noisy (possibly too noisy for some), but if anyone’s going to get a debate going, Darren will.

Travel writers on Twitter

Terry Carter (aka @terencecarter): Part of husband and wife duo with @laradunston. I love Lara’s blog but find Terry more interesting on Twitter – not quite sure why – but he’s honest and humorous most of the time.

Charlie Connelly (aka @charlieconnelly): Ireland-based travel writer and author who, while a little detached from the travel industry discussion, is consistently funny.

Nathan Midgley (aka @twblog): Online editor and blogger for UK trade publication Travel Weekly. Nathan joins in the debate (even the silly ones) and is usually quite humorous. He usually chips in with good links, opinions and insider knowledge.

Benji Lanyado (aka @benjilanyado): Budget travel and social media expert for The Guardian (and occasionally the New York Times). Happy to experiment with Twitter-based trips; knowledgeable and pretty entertaining to boot.

Will Hide (aka @willhide): Starts debates, is generally amusing and forthright, and digs out the occasional gem from elsewhere on the web.

PR/ media people who get Twitter right

Jemima from Cheapflights.co.uk* (aka @cheapflightsuk): Joins in the discussion, makes helpful suggestions, judiciously points out good travel deals without going overboard.

Steve Keenan (aka @timestravel): Instead of just pumping out headlines from The Times of London’s travel section and site, Steve Keenan interacts, retweets and points out interesting snippets that aren’t necessarily on Timesonline.co.uk.

Travel PR Company (aka @travel_PR): Richard and Ian rarely use Twitter as an excuse to bellow about their own clients – praise the heavens. What they do manage to do is provide thoughtful links, chip into discussions where appropriate and retweet the best of the people they follow. Exactly how PR people should be using Twitter.

Got any favourite travel Twitterers of your own? Why not share the love and suggest them below by leaving a comment – preferably one that explains why you think it’s worth following that person.

I’m fairly sure that this one will open up a can of worms, but let’s run with it anyway. Cards on the table  – I hate tipping, hate the fact that I’m expected to tip, and hate the attitude I’m given when I don’t.

And yes, this means tipping in all circumstances, including when the service is good. I don’t buy the often-used wimp-out argument of: “I don’t mind tipping when it’s good service, but I object to it when it is average or not good enough.”

Why pay more?

I’m afraid I’m something of an extremist on the subject. I often do tip, but it’s usually with gritted teeth and through a desire to keep the peace. I’d much prefer it if no-one had to, ever, and the ridiculous expectation to put an extra 10% or 15% on a price was permanently done away with.

Yes, I know, I’m a horrible, tight-fisted bastard who wishes to exploit slave labour and rudely stomp all over different cultures. But I’m sticking to my guns (unless out for dinner with people I’m trying to impress, in which case I’ll bottle out and pretend that I’m happily giving away extra cash for no apparent reason).

Add-on charges for flights, hotel rooms and tours

My antipathy towards tipping is much the same as my antipathy to add-on charges. It’s not really about not being willing to pay the price, it’s being told it’s one price, and then having no option but to pay extra.

To me, it’s the same as airlines advertising flights with the insidious addition of “plus taxes and charges”. It’s the same as advertising hotel rooms without mentioning the spurious government, environment and just-for-the-hell-of-it taxes that will be added to the bill afterwards. It’s the same as booking a tour and later discovering that you also need to make an on-the-ground payment.

I’m sure most of us would agree that these examples are just plain out of order – they’re nasty little tricks to make things look cheaper than they are, and they border on outright dishonesty.

The advertised price and the actual price

My philosophy is simple; if something is advertised at a certain price, that’s how much it should cost. This is especially the case when the hidden extra charges are clearly an immovable part of the product. I don’t mind being charged to check in baggage on a plane – I clearly have the option of packing light. But I do mind being charged a fuel surcharge – that’s an integral part of the operating costs. It’s not as if I can say: “Here - use this fuel that I bought a while back at a cheaper price.”

And tipping works on the same theme. To say “service not included” in a restaurant is utter nonsense.

Restaurant service: part of the package

The point of a restaurant is that it provides a package. Someone buys the food, someone cooks the food, someone brings it over and brings you some wine as well if you so desire. Service isn’t an optional part of the restaurant experience; it’s integral to it, and cannot justifiably be split off into a separate charge.

If I have the option of collecting the food from the kitchen and wine from the bar myself, then I can understand: I can make the decision on whether to purchase the optional extra of being served at the table. But if that option isn’t there, then don’t make me pay more for something that is clearly part of the product.

Tipping taxi drivers, bartenders and cleaning maids

I also despise the arbitrary nature of who I am supposed to tip. Why should I give extra to a taxi driver but not a bus driver? Why does the cleaning maid deserve a tip and not the man who toils away in the gardens? Why should I tip the waitress and the bartender, but not the shop assistant or bank teller? It’s a plainly ridiculous state of affairs, and it’s perpetuated by people who want to be seen to be doing the right thing. We keep tipping because there will always be someone who looks at us as if we’re dog dirt the moment we refuse to.

Tipping as method of making up a wage for the low-paid

And then there’s the low pay argument – often heard in a squawking American accent: “These people earn virtually nothing; they rely on tips; this unfair system is what keeps the prices so low.”

I’d much sooner the prices were put up to cover a decent wage – at least that’s honest rather than using emotional blackmail to extract extra cash.

And I’ll have to trot out the ultimate crass argument – if they don’t like what they’re getting paid, then they can go and get another job where they get paid more. I’m not allowed to say that, am I? It’s culturally insensitive, isn’t it? Well, tough – it’s the truth.

Different rules for travel and hospitality industries

I’m a firm believer that the travel and hospitality industries should work just like any other. People shouldn’t need to be given extra reward by customers for simply doing their job. It’s their job; if they don’t do it, sack them. The reward for doing a job well – as in any other industry – should be repeat custom, and good word of mouth.

An add-on charge by any other name

I really am at a loss to understand why tipping – an add-on charge by any other name – is not just socially acceptable, but often socially expected. Those of us who try not to give in and tip are almost unquestionably in the right, yet are made to feel like pariahs for it. Sadly, I can’t really see this absurd state of affairs changing any time soon.

What are your views on tipping? Please share them below by leaving a comment.

Time for part two of the rant, then…

Patchy WiFi access

The second thing that infuriates me about WiFi in hotels is that the coverage is often disgracefully patchy. If they can get it working in the first place, hoteliers seem to think that’s an achievement enough. If it only works in reception and a selection of rooms on the first floor, well that’s just fine, isn’t it? Not as if having an internet connection is important to anyone, is it?

I loathe it when I check in somewhere that says it has in-room internet access, only to find that said internet access is only in a selection of the rooms.

A common response when I ask how to log in is along these lines: “Hmm, well you might be able to get it on your floor. It’s definitely OK on the first and most of the second. Not sure about the third – but if you can’t get it, then just come down to the lobby – it’s fine there.”

In-room wireless access – for the lucky few

This is disgraceful. If a hotel advertises in-room wireless access, then it had better be in EVERY room. Why should a guest in one part of the hotel be paying the same – or an even lower – price and get the benefit of a publicised facility while I don’t? I have no desire to be part of such a ridiculous lottery.

When some rooms have air conditioning, others have ceiling fans and others have neither, it is described and priced accordingly. The same applies for en-suite bathrooms versus shared bathrooms. A hotel could never get away with advertising en-suite rooms with air-con and then sticking people in a room that has neither.

The same should apply to WiFi. That it doesn’t is indicative of the resting on laurels that takes part across a large swathe of the hotel industry. And it also means that we need to start complaining in order to stop the WiFi coverage con from happening.

So why do I keep coming across hotels that think it’s perfectly OK to push two beds together and call it a double? It’s not – it’s just a tight-arsed non-solution that makes precisely nobody happy. For couples, it means a nasty great split down the middle that someone either acts as a post-coital barricade or ensures that one poor soul has to lie in the ridge.

And then, of course, if either party has the temerity to move at any stage, the beds shift with them, creating an even larger crevasse.

No publicity

I’ve long had a policy of not giving publicity to any hotel that does this. If I’m writing an article about somewhere, I will never include a hotel that does calls two singles a double, even if the establishment put me up for free. It’s simply not good enough, and I’m staggered that so many hotels think they can get away with it.

Continental Europe tends to be the worst place for this – I’ve come across it in pretty much every country, with France and Italy being particularly bad offenders.

False claim

Pushing two singles together and calling it a double is making a false claim on the key aspect of a hotel’s product. This wouldn’t be allowed in any other industry. An estate agent can’t advertise a large house that’s actually two small houses with a big wall in the middle. A clothes store can’t try and sell four little shoes as a pair of big shoes. A furniture store can’t sellotape two chairs together and call it a sofa.

Buying unseen

But hotels can get away with it, largely because it’s an industry where products are bought unseen, and there’s that certain expectation amongst customers that they’ll get the odd duff one. Refuse to take the room upon seeing the beds, and there’s not a lot of room for manoeuvre – even if a refund is possible, there’s then the rigmarole of finding somewhere else.

It’s a sad state of affairs; let’s just hope a wee bit of Darwinism occurs and that the hotels trying to make two become one are driven out of business by lack of custom.

Suffice to say, this is likely to be the first of many rants on the subject. I shall come to cost, coverage and dodgy advertising at a later date, but the key reason that most hotels get it wrong is that they simply don’t care.

Wireless not working

I’ve lost count of the times that I’ve stayed at a hotel where the wireless isn’t working. One or two times, you can understand it – service providers do have downtime. But the consistency with which advertised WiFi does not materialise is an industry-wide joke.

The general rigmarole goes as follows:

1. Try logging in to wireless network and discover it’s not working.
2. Go to reception to find out what the problem is.
3. Be met with a response along the lines of: “Oh, it often goes down,” or “yeah – it’s been like that for a couple of weeks”.

Other hotel facilities

There’s no attempt to fix the problem, just a shrug of the shoulders and an acceptance that one of the facilities that the hotel advertises is a bit rubbish.

Would this attitude be taken with any other hotel facilities? Would they allow a broken air conditioning unit to go unmended for weeks on end? Would they just not serve food if the stove in the restaurant kitchen broke? Would they not bother cleaning the en-suite bathrooms? Of course not.

Huge inconvenience of no internet

But the attitude to wireless is that it’s some mystical, temperamental creature that should be allowed to sleep at will. It doesn’t really matter, and no-one’s really going to be bothered about it.

Well, my friends, they are going to be bothered about it. For a business traveller – and many leisure travellers – it’s a huge inconvenience not to be able to access the internet. And more to the point, if you’re advertising that you’ve got it, you should make sure it works.

Setting up a wireless network

Put simply, the main reason why Johnny Hotelier’s wireless hasn’t been working for two weeks is that he never set it up properly in the first place. And he doesn’t care about his guests enough to sort the problem out.

Well I’m sorry, but if you advertise wireless access, then you’d better give wireless access. If I went to a zoo to see an advertised white tiger, only to be told it died three months ago, I’d be justifiably fuming. Similarly, I don’t expect to buy a DVD billed as having extra features to find that it’s really just the film.

If it doesn’t work – get it fixed

There’s no excuse for this, hotel managers. If your wireless system doesn’t work properly, then fix it. And if you don’t know how to fix it, get someone in who can set it up properly and teach your staff how to get it working again if things go wrong. Otherwise, don’t con people into staying at your establishment by saying you provide wireless internet access.

Anti swine-flu precautions

But I experienced the flipside on my way back from Australia to the UK two weeks ago – and I can’t quite work out whether I’m justified in taking offence. I flew back with Cathay Pacific, and all crew members were wearing those anti –swine flu face masks.

Personally, I think such masks are a pathetic waste of time. They don’t make any difference other than to make the wearer look ridiculous. Oh yes, and they also reduce any speech to a mumble.

Rude or sensible?

The crew members kept the masks on all flight, even when trying to talk to passengers. Now I find this pretty damned rude – but is this unfair? Part of me says that I should respect the position that air crews are in; they are in the front line when it comes to infectious diseases (even if they are as ridiculously overplayed as the current swine flu pandemic).

Another part of me says that I should respect cultural differences – wearing such masks is clearly more common in Asia.

But the insensitive boor in me wins out; if you’re in the service industry, you shouldn’t look like you view your customers as a disease-ridden nuisance.

Am I right here? Or just being both ridiculous and insensitive? Share your thoughts by leaving a comment.